Procrastination and Self-Sabotage
We all procrastinate sometimes, but it becomes painful when you deeply want change and yet feel stuck, full of excuses, and unable to move forward. Here’s the truth: procrastination is not laziness. It’s not a lack of discipline or motivation. Beating yourself up only lowers your confidence and makes it harder to break free. Procrastination […]
Healing from Low Self-Esteem
Low self-esteem doesn’t just show up as a lack of confidence. It comes with constant negative self-talk, difficulty setting boundaries, and struggling to speak up for yourself. But here’s the truth: low self-esteem isn’t the problem – it’s a symptom of something deeper. From childhood, we’re taught that fitting in matters more than being ourselves. […]
What is Trauma?
Most people think trauma means a single extreme event that leaves someone broken. In reality, trauma is what happens when an overwhelming experience cannot be fully processed or released. Animals show us how it works. After a fight or a near-death chase, they shake, cry, or release energy in their natural way – and then […]
How to be Happy
Everyone wants to be happy, but it feels shallow to admit it. So we chase it indirectly: a promotion, more money, the right house, the admiration of others. We tell ourselves that once we achieve those things, we will finally feel complete. But it never works. The cycle continues – buy more, do more, search […]
Finding My Purpose
I spent 20 years searching for my “purpose” and found nothing. The whole idea of purpose is a trap – a mental delusion. There is no lost purpose waiting to be found. Life already has meaning. You were never missing anything. When we are born, we live fully in our bodies. No past, no future. […]
The Truth
The truth is deeply personal. What feels true for me today wasn’t true even a year ago. Everything I share comes from my own experience. I am not here to hand you the truth or tell you what’s right or wrong for you. So much conflict and suffering in the world comes from people fighting […]
Ceremony 22 – San Pedro – 24th Jan 15
This ceremony was my last of my current visit to Peru, and there isn’t much to say about it other than it was a blissful ending and a sign of how far I’d come. Rather than the usual powdered mixture, I drunk a different kind of medicine. The San Pedro is boiled further and refined […]
Ceremony 21 – Ayahuasca – 21st Jan 15
I drunk a single cup again in this ceremony – possibly ever so slightly more than the last ceremony, and then lay on my back and put my awareness on my breathing. I begun to notice minor distortions in the room and fidgeted a bit before relaxing and allowing the process to start. An octopus was […]
Ceremony 20 – Ayahuasca – 18th Jan 15
My intention for this ceremony was to simply lie back and relax into whatever comes – no resistance, no attachment. This was something that I was bringing more and more often to ceremonies. We all drunk as usual, and I lay on my back patiently. I only needed the one cup this ceremony, and it […]
Ceremony 19 – San Pedro – 15th Jan 15
From an intellectual perspective, each ceremony goes deeper and gets harder. From outside of the mind though, the ceremonies get easier. The suffering is caused by resistance, and with less and less resistance, it’s more a case of “it is whatever it is”. I realized in this ceremony that more and more of the things […]